Victim vs. Creator Language in Hooping

Repost from our previous blog site - originally published on April 19, 2015 at 10:39am 

A screen shot from a video I took of me hooping at Freedom Falls, PA. 
I extended my comfort zone by traveling here and endured a steep, challenging hike to and from 
this unique place. I am proud of this adventure and plan to continue pushing my limits.

I have been hooping for over 3 years now. I have had many people compliment me on how far I have come and the progress I have made. However, I am never quite satisfied with it. I always want to go harder, faster, better, and further. There are countless goals, techniques, and tricks I still want to learn and master. With each new accomplishment, I immediately want to move on to the next accomplishment.

Often in my journey, I experience negativity and anxiety. I am forcing myself to avoid distractions and to face this head-on. I know I am in control of my mind and attitude. I am determined to always be positive and motivated. In this self-awareness that I am experiencing, I have noticed just how much of my success has been severely hindered by something. It is the biggest threat to my success (and many others I am sure).


I am often making excuses for just about everything that keeps me from progressing. My house is too small to practice in with low ceilings, its raining, its cold, I don't like to hoop before the afternoon, I don't like to hoop by myself. These are just some of the excuses I have made over the years. I really want to change these excuses into opportunities to grow.

I have been taking a college course in Interpersonal Communication to finish out my bachelor's degree. The biggest lesson I have learned so far is the difference between "Victim Language" and "Creator Language". In order to take my positivity to the next level, I must master creator language. Changing from a Victim to a Creator takes strength and motivation, but those things are within us at all times. It just depends on how well you can bring them out of yourself.

Victim Language vs. Creator Language:

Victims make excuses: "It is easy to diet until you get upset about something"

Creators propose solutions: "The next time I get upset, I will go for a walk instead of eating"

Victims blame others: "I don't hoop often because no one does it with me"

Creators take responsibility: "I will practice alone, even if I prefer to practice with others"

Victims repeat ineffective behavior: "Going to the gym every week is hard because there isn't enough room to practice"

Creators do something new: "I looked around for a few weeks and I found a new indoor space that is large enough to practice in"

Victims "try": "I will try to make it to practice tomorrow, if I feel like it" or "I will see"

Creators commit and follow through: "I will practice tomorrow at 5pm, no matter how I feel"

The most destructive of all, Victims give up: "I will never be able to do that trick. I give up"

Creators take control of their choices and their goals: "I will get help and work on that trick until I get it, even if it takes years. I will do it"


The only thing that is going to bring me out of this struggle is to start using creator language when I speak to myself and to others. While I was at the dance studio practicing yesterday, I was spending my time trying to learn some difficult moves. I realized this morning that I have enough space in my house to practice those moves. There are many other moves that I can be working on inside my small house, even if I don't have space to flow freely. I do get angry at the lack of space, but I should be grateful with the space I am given.

So no matter if it is cold outside, raining, or if the dance studio is not available to me, I do have the option to get better. I must keep these creator thoughts at the top of my priority list.